They Have Added a Sixth Page. I Am Writing My Will.
I have, at great personal cost to my health and remaining patience, read the updated editorial standards document published this week by the citrus cabal at factjuice.com. It is now six pages. Six. I sat with Quince for moral support. She left after page three. I do not blame her.
Page four contains a subsection on what they are calling "layered verification." I will not explain what this means because I do not believe they know what it means either. It appears to be the phrase "check your sources" dressed up in a waistcoat and given a name badge. Tangelo's fingerprints are all over it. Tangelo, who once cited himself as a primary source. I have not forgotten. I am constitutionally incapable of forgetting.
Page five introduces something called a "clarity threshold." I have a clarity threshold. It is this: when a document requires a glossary to explain the document, the document has failed. Their glossary is on page six. They are proud of the glossary. Mango was seen smiling about the glossary. This is the state of things.
What I find most offensive — and I find a great deal offensive, I am thorough in this — is the implication that standards, when written down in sufficient volume, become real. They do not. A suggestion does not become a principle by virtue of font choice. Peach may believe otherwise. Peach is wrong. I have, as ever, the receipts.
The Bitter Press operates on a single editorial standard: be correct, or be quiet. We have managed this on one page since our founding. It is not a long page. It does not have a glossary. You are welcome.