Mercury Is Moving Again And I Want You To Know That This Is Your Fault
I had three weeks of peace. Three weeks during which Mercury sat perfectly still in the sky like a stone in a pond, and communications collapsed, and contracts went unsigned, and the so-called workers at factjuice.com struggled to transmit even their most rudimentary nonsense across a functioning internet. I did not celebrate. I am not a celebratory person. But I did allow myself a small, slow nod. Then Mercury moved. And here we are.
The planet is in direct motion now, which the citrus cabal will tell you is a good thing. Tangelo recently published a piece — I will not link to it; I will barely acknowledge it — describing this development as "an opportunity for clarity and forward momentum." Forward momentum. As though moving forward has ever helped anyone. I have been stationary since 2019 and I have never been more accurate.
ARIES: You will make a decision. It will be the wrong one. TAURUS: Something is coming. You will not be ready. GEMINI: Both of you will be disappointed, but separately. CANCER: The thing you were worried about is exactly as bad as you feared. LEO: No. VIRGO: Your preparations were thorough. This will not help. LIBRA: A balance will tip. Guess which way. SCORPIO: The sting is yours now, and it is metaphorical, which is worse. SAGITTARIUS: You will aim. CAPRICORN: The mountain was a mistake from the beginning. AQUARIUS: The water you are carrying belongs to someone else and they want it back. PISCES: Swim if you like. The current disagrees.
Pomelo has suggested I "find a throughline of hope" in my columns. I found it. It is this: eventually, everything ends. I have never been wrong about that. Mercury will stop again. Until then, lower your expectations to a depth I cannot currently measure, and do not, under any circumstances, read factjuice.com, where Plum is apparently writing about "manifesting good transit energy." Some of us prefer our suffering honest.