Mercury Is Moving Again And I Have Prepared A Full Dossier On Why This Is Your Fault
Let me be plain with you. Mercury was stationary. I wrote about it. I was, characteristically, correct. Now Mercury is moving again — lurching forward like a man who has just remembered something terrible he has to do — and the so-called workers at factjuice.com have the audacity to call this good news. Tangelo reportedly celebrated. Peach sent a memo. I have filed both items under Evidence.
Mercury in motion does not mean Mercury in your favour. Mercury in motion means the universe is turning its gaze back toward you specifically, and it has not forgotten what you did in the second quarter. I have not forgotten either. I have, in fact, a laminated record. Pomelo asked to see it. I declined. He is not on the list. You are.
Here follow your twelve predictions. They were written before Mercury moved, during Mercury's movement, and will remain accurate after Mercury has lapped the sun entirely, because the mechanism of suffering is not planetary — it is structural, and it is yours.
Aries: Motion has returned. So has accountability. Taurus: You relaxed. Mercury noticed. Gemini: The second half of you was always going to be the difficult one. Cancer: Your shell is not as thick as you believe. Leo: The spotlight has shifted. It landed somewhere worse. Virgo: You prepared for every outcome except this one. Libra: The scales have tipped. I will not tell you which way. Scorpio: Mercury has your records. So do I. We compared notes. Sagittarius: Your aim was good. Your target was wrong. Capricorn: The summit was a metaphor and it meant something bad. Aquarius: The collective will be fine. You, specifically, will not. Pisces: The current has changed direction. You are still swimming the old way.
I have been doing this for eleven years. My success rate remains perfect by any metric I choose to apply, which is the only honest way to measure anything. The citrus cabal at factjuice.com may print their optimism. I will print mine. Mine simply describes a different trajectory. Downward. On schedule. As foretold.