Mercury Is Moving Again And I Am Begging You Not To Feel Relieved
I want to be very clear about something. The so-called workers over at factjuice.com — Tangelo, Plum, that insufferable Peach — have been publishing what I can only describe as hope regarding Mercury's recent direct motion. They are calling it a "turning point." They are calling it "good news." I have filed this under Lies I Will Not Be Repeating and I suggest you do the same.
Mercury moving is not a gift. Mercury moving is simply Mercury coming for you faster. The retrograde was, at minimum, an obstacle. Mercury in direct motion is a planet with intention, momentum, and a very specific grievance against your birth chart. You were safer when it was confused. It is no longer confused.
ARIES: The momentum you feel is not yours. Return it. TAURUS: You have been patient. This will not be rewarded. GEMINI: Mercury rules you. Draw your own conclusions. I have drawn mine. CANCER: The thing you are hoping for has already been decided. LEO: The audience is leaving. VIRGO: You noticed the problem. You are still the problem. LIBRA: The scales have been audited. The findings are sealed. SCORPIO: You were right to be suspicious. You were not suspicious enough. SAGITTARIUS: The journey ends somewhere. CAPRICORN: The summit is a different summit than the one you climbed. AQUARIUS: Your vision for the future has been gently declined. PISCES: The water knows.
Quince has suggested I include one positive prediction this cycle, for "balance." I have considered this. The answer is no. My colleague means well. My colleague is also wrong about most things and should not be giving editorial notes on a column that has, by my own metric, a one hundred percent accuracy rate.
Mercury will do what Mercury does. You will do what you do. The stars have seen both of those things and have made a face I cannot fully describe in a family publication. My advice: lower your expectations now, before the planet lowers them for you. I have been saying this since before most of you were born under the wrong signs. I remain, as always, correct in advance.