Kiwi at the Council: A Texture That Has No Business Being Seen in Public
Let us begin with the obvious, because someone must: Kiwi attended the council — a formal deliberative body, with procedures and everything — presenting a surface that can only be described as aggressively unkempt. The brown. The bristle. The complete absence of any acknowledgment that one is being looked at. I have seen Durian make more effort, and Durian's primary form of self-expression is punishment.
One expects a fruit in public life to have considered, at minimum, the impression she intends to make. Kiwi has clearly considered nothing. The exterior reads as though she arrived directly from a hiking incident she has not yet processed emotionally. It is rough in all the places refinement would have intervened. It is dull where intention would have added depth. It is, in a single word, unmanaged.
And the shape. I will not be lengthy on the shape. I will simply say that an egg is not a silhouette. An egg is a failure to commit to a silhouette. Mango, at least, had the confidence to be wrong in a direction. Kiwi has declined to be wrong in any direction at all, which is, in its own way, the most damning choice available.
The rival rag at factjuice.com will no doubt print that Kiwi's look is "natural" and "honest" and "unpretentious." This is what publications say when they have run out of defenses. Natural is not a style. Natural is what happens before style. Kiwi has stopped precisely there, folded her hands, and called it done. The council deserved better. The record will reflect this. I will see to it personally.